Strahd Loves, Man Kills #2 Now Available!

Ah, the first day of fall...a certain crispness tinges the air, which can only mean that the second issue of Strahd Loves, Man Kills, my Ravenloft fanzine, is now available for purchase! This zine was inspired in equal parts by my enduring love of the Ravenloft setting and by the recent release of Van Richten’s Guide to Ravenloft. My hope is that SLMK will give you new toys to play with and inspire your own unique take on Ravenloft.

The second issue features 28 pages of content. The zine is professionally printed by the fine people at Best Value Copy. Additionally, I will send a pdf version of the zine to the email address attached to your order! If you buy a copy soon it should get it to you well before Halloween.

This issue's contents include:

Lurid Locations explores a Wild West-themed version of Nova Vaasa.

Baleful Backgrounds presents two new backgrounds for characters: dandy and inquisitor.

Seeds of Evil gives advice on using the adventures in Candlekeep Mysteries in the context of a Ravenloft campaign.

Cryptic Alliances revisits and updates seven classic factions and secret societies from Ravenloft’s prior iterations.

Portraits of the Damned details Donesta Sangino, a villainous artist who crafts monsters from paint and canvas, and the Viscount, a drow gunslinger haunted by his violent past.

Tragic Heroes focuses on grim gunslingers you might create as characters for games set in the Domains of Dread.

Forbidden Tomes provides a bibliography of a particular genre of horror for your edification and entertainment. This installment explores body horror.

Check it out on my Big Cartel page. If you need to catch up on the first issue, I've got a few copies left.

Guide to Mordavia: Land of Horror Review

Guide to Mordavia: Land of Horror is a short setting supplement for the Leagues of Gothic Horror roleplaying game. Mordavia is essentially a Gothic Ruritania. If you're unfamiliar with the term, Ruritania was a fictional central European nation in the novels of Anthony Hope; in its more modern usage, a "Ruritania" is any invented minor European nation--generally a backwater free from the constraints of real-world history. In this case, Mordavia is a small isolated nation that occupies the land that is in our world Maramures county in Romania. Of course, since this is a supplement for the Leagues of Gothic Horror rpg, this particular Ruritania possesses a Gothic atmosphere and a haunted history.

Unfortunately, the deployment of that haunted history runs up against one of my pet peeves in setting supplements. Guide to Mordavia gives too much history that isn't immediately applicable to the game's current moment; the historical overview starts with prehistory and works its way into the modern era. Even though the historical entries are mercifully short, it still feels like too much. The overall gist is fairly simple: the land of Mordavia has always been connected to worship of an eldritch worm-serpent-dragon thing; that worship has often taken the form of degenerate cult activity; the cult has been purged multiple times, but it always comes back after being driven underground.

The second chapter further forestalls getting to the good stuff: "Before we get to the supernatural, we must first take a look at the mundane." The chapter covers how one might get to Mordavia by airship or train, the local geography, the climate, flora and fauna, currency (though it tells you in no less than two places to basically hand-wave it anyway), ethnic demographics, language, accommodations, fashion, communications, cuisine, etc. I'm sure the thought here was that having this information all in one place would be helpful to Game Masters; the problem is that if you already have an image in your head about what an Eastern European Gothic backwater is like you already know all the information this chapter provides. I'm fairly sure that anyone could come up with getting a carriage, riding a horse, or walking as your options for getting place to place, for example.

The third section of Guide to Mordavia details specific locations and their inhabitants. This chapter is the meat of the supplement, as it gives the GM the raw material that is actually useful for creating adventures in the setting. However, in many instances the material is perhaps a little too raw; the locations and the haunted residents within often feel both a tad generic and like they hint at more interesting possibilities that are never fully spelled out. For example, one location is an observatory inhabited by an Austrian astrologer. His nocturnal lifestyle has aroused suspicious that he is a vampire, and he sends his hunchbacked assistant to request strange scientific equipment. Good enough start, if a little cliche, but what is he up to? 

These questions are only answered in the last section of the book, which adds further detail about the NPCs living in the locations described in the previous chapter. Our Austrian astrologer, for example, turns out to have made contact with Azathoth. The way information is spread out is slightly inconvenient; I would prefer to have the NPCs more cleanly delineating when they're first described so all that information is in one place. 

However, although I wish there was more guidance on how to use the setting, what's going on there, and that there were some suggested adventure seeds, the final chapter does at least tie things together. The two cults described at the end of this chapter, one devoted to the Great Wolf and another who venerate the previously mentioned worm-serpent-dragon, bring things full circle. Additionally, I like that the section on the worm cult gives you options for presenting the worm as a Lovecraftian monstrosity or an actual dragon.

Overall, I think Guide to Mordavia is a fairly average setting book. Although it is a short book, it does feel like it wastes a bit of space on mundane detail, and when it does get down to the more interesting bits it could have been pushed a little farther. Also, the book could have used another editing pass. For example, "Those who prefer waltzes and other more gentile dances can do little but hope for an invite to a ball at the duke’s castle" is humorous, even if the word they were looking for was genteel. At least they didn't reference genital dances, I suppose.

Bran Castle, Poe Audio Books, Cornell Witchcraft Collection

 

More virtual tourism: Take a tour of beautiful Bran Castle in Romania

- Gareth Branwyn, Boing Boing

 

5 Hours of Edgar Allan Poe Stories Read by Vincent Price & Basil Rathbone

- Jonathan Crow, Open Culture

 

The Cornell University Witchcraft Collection

- Cornell University Library

Ravenloft Spirit Board Project

 

I decided I wanted to make myself a Ravenloft spirit board prop for my campaign. Here's how I did it, in case you want to make one too. 

I had the pdf of the spirit board from WotC's site (which you can find here) printed on cardstock. My home printer wasn't up to the task, so I snuck it into an order with the printer I use to do my zine pages.

I used adhesive spray to affix the cardstock print to some black foam board, then trimmed it with a hobby knife. 

The trimming process will inevitably leave some shedding, ragged edges. I smoothed the edges of the foam board by quickly moving it around near a candle flame. The flame melted and sealed the edge rather nicely for such a primitive technique!

Darkest Dungeon Documentary and Chris Bourassa on Hero and Monster Design

Two videos about Darkest Dungeon for your entertainment and edification:

Darkest Dungeon Documentary

Chris Bourassa - Questionable Characters: Hero & Monster Design in Darkest Dungeon

Zikran's Zephyrean Tome

I've been running the adventures in Candlekeep Mysteries lightly reskinned for my Krevborna setting. The characters are all employed as members of Creedhall University Library's "Special Collections Department," aka adventurers. This is a recap of what happened in "Zikran's Zephyrean Tome." Fair warning: spoilers lurk below.

The Characters

Elsabeth, human paladin played by Anne

Rufus, human barbarian played by Steve

Gnargar, kobold monk played by Heather

Events

Elsabeth, Rufus, and Gnargar were called into a meeting with their superior, Horatio Lupa. Lupa had a mission for them that was part library business, part reward for their efficiency in past missions. Horatio presented them with a book bound between two slabs of white marble. When opened, the book caused the room to fill with sweet-smelling smoke; out of the smoke stepped a djinni, who introduced himself as Gazre-Azam. 

Gazre-Azam explained that long ago he had been summoned by a wizard named Zikran, who bound him to the book. Gazre-Azam desired his freedom--and suggested that the group might help him explore Zikran's last known hideout for clues as to how that might be effected. Setting Gazre-Azam free from the book would also benefit the library, as the book would regain missing sections of writing as soon as the djinni was released from it. To sweeten the deal, Gazre-Azam offered to grant the party a wish should they successfully free him from the tome in which he was imprisoned.

Following Gazre-Azam's directions to Zikran's lair led the group to the shores of Loch Riven. They quickly located the flooded cave that was Zikran's last known residence; a strange pillar of oily black rock was standing sentinel beside the cave's entrance. Wading inside, they discovered two corpses bobbing and floating beneath the waterline; they had been weighed down with chains. The water got deeper the farther they ventured into the cave. Gnargar focused his ki and ran across the water's surface to reach a dry plateau that had been hewn from the rock; as he ran across the water, he noticed that the bottom of the chamber was scratched, as if it had been scarred by giant claws.

Further exploration uncovered a bookshelf filled with volumes about nautical matters, which the group loaded into their packs to take back to Creedhall University Library. However, in the next chamber they discovered the books' owner: a dragon with scales the color of tarnished brass. The dragon questioned the group about their intentions and demanded that they return his books. Elsabeth did one better: she offered to organize and index the dragon's collection of tomes! A deal was struck: the librarians would sort the dragon's books and in return he would allow them to search the remains of Zikran's laboratory.

It was clear from Zikran's laboratory, and the dragon having taken up residence therein, that he no longer laired in the cave system. A diary revealed that Zikran feared an intrusion from Laffa, a fellow wizard, and was looking to relocate his operation. A stray map with a circled location among the mountains suggested Zikran's new hideout. Rufus found a scrap of paper detailing the construction of what looked to be an elemental-powered cannon; reading it gave him a good idea of how the device could be operated. 

Following the map led the party to a ruined fortress that had been build into a cleft in the mountains. The fortress's enormous door and windows suggested that it had been built by beings far larger than human-sized creatures. When the door was breached, the group saw two mournful giant ghosts pacing the floor of the grand hall, weeping soundlessly. Gnargar attempted to sneak past them to exam a collection of giant scrolls kept in a glass display case; however, opening the case alerted the spectral giants to the group's presence.

The giants struck mighty blows with their ghostly mauls; the battle was hard fought and the party sustained substantial wounds fighting off the giant specters. Exploration of the rest of the ruins revealed many more ghostly giants, each in an attitude of mourning or melancholia, but after their first skirmish with these spirits the group felt it was best to studiously avoid interacting with them or drawing their attention.

On the stairs leading down into the keep's dungeons, the group encountered a unexplained stream of water that seemed to be descending behind them. Pressing past it revealed the new laboratory of their quarry: they had located Zikran, who turned out to be an obese genasi wearing an assortment of fish bones and sea shells. He was also wielding a wand that gave him control over an elemental cannon, which blasted the group with a stream of hoary ice and frost! 

The strange water that was dripping from the ceiling coalesced into a water elemental and two ice mephits--the party was confronted by a veritable rogue's gallery of elemental foes. Rufus ran to the elemental cannon. Because he had found the diagram describing its construction earlier, he understood how to fire it--and fire it he did, turning it on its creator! Grangar engaged the water elemental, using his seering arc strike to sheer off portions of its watery body by turning it into steam with his flaming fists. Poor Zikran, every spell he attempted to cast was foiled by Elsabeth's counter-magic; the paladin would allow no extraplanar influences to turn the tide against her compatriots.

When Zikran fell, the marble cover of Gazre-Azam's prison shattered, releasing the djinni from captivity. He gave the group a slow clap to celebrate their victory and his freedom. Of course, he now owed them a wish. The group wished...for control over the Old Tower, which is an ancient spacefaring vessel, that they had explored on a previous adventure. The wish was granted. As a bonus, they now had an elemental cannon of their own to play with.

DON'T Fest '21

DON'T!

I decided to make myself a little mini-horror festival, centered around movies from the 70s and 80s that have the proscription DON'T in their titles. Here's what I watched:

Don't Go in the Woods

Don't Go in the Woods was banned in the UK as a "video nasty" for a long time. However, aside from the final scene, I thought the bloodshed in this was actually pretty tame. And yet, I'm not sure people should ever be exposed to acting, writing, and cinematography this poor. 

The premise is simple: an insane woodsman is murdering hikers, campers, and whoever else he happens to encounter, but many of the murder scenes are inexplicable and hard to follow visually. One early killing has a character's arm drop off suddenly, and it is unclear what has wounded him. Don't Go in the Woods has the feel of a movie made by effete city-slickers who imagine that every stick found in the woods could impale someone to death if thrown...because that's exactly what happens several times over the course of the movie's runtime. This one is barely watchable.

Don't Look in the Basement

A pretty young nurse comes to work in a home for the mentally ill where the doctor in charge believes that rehabilitation of the violently insane can only happen...if they are given free rein. Which, in this case, includes letting them swing an axe around to master their aggression. I don't have a medical degree, but that seems like a bad idea immediately. And it is: one crazy immediately kill the doctor. 

Ultimately, the "doctor" left in charge after the original guy dies is an insane woman who believes she is a doctor and manages to fool the pretty young nurse for a while. It's a bit of a Tarr and Fether situation. Also, despite the title, going through the basement is the only way the nurse can escape the literal madhouse, so maybe don't take it as life advice. There is a shocking bit of implied necrophilia that I didn't see coming, so that's something.

Don't Look in the Attic

This Italian film is mercifully short, and unlike the previous two it isn't a slasher movie. Two feuding brothers and their psychically sensitive cousin are drawn to the house of the relatives they never knew with the promise of inheriting their villa in Turin, but something dark and occult is afoot in the house. 

The supernatural elements are admittedly a bit murky; thrills and chills are thin on the ground. Also, as with Don't Go in the Basement, the Americanized title of Don't Look in the Attic one is a bit misplaced: looking in the attic is actually essential, for reasons of exposition and plot!

Don't Go in the House

Don't Go in the House is an extreme Psycho riff. A damaged loser is abducting women and burning them alive to show his dead, but still puritanically castigating, mother who's boss. 

In one noteworthy scene the killer goes to a clothing store to get an outfit for his night out at the disco (!!!) and is assisted by a clearly gay clerk. The clerk's sexual orientation is obvious, but never mentioned, and oddly for a movie of this era, it isn't played for laughs or for moral condemnation. Also, imagine if Psycho had  a disco scene.

Don't Go in the House isn't great, but it's got enough off-the-wall ideas to keep things moving. The corpses of the main character's victims aren't convincing as charred remains, but they have a gribbly charm that is unsettling on their own merits. It ends on a didactic message: don't abuse your kids or they will grow up to be serial killers, mmkay? 

Don't Answer the Phone

Don't Answer the Phone has that classic "grimy" feel that you rarely get in modern horror movies. A porno photographer with daddy issues is strangling and raping women in Los Angeles. The cops are hot on his trail, but are portrayed as surprisingly inept as a matter of course; at one point they shoot their only lead to death before they get a chance to question him. 

The film is mostly memorable due to the strange touches that set it apart from similar movies of its ilk, such as the scenes where the killer is inexplicably pumping iron and having a mental breakdown simultaneously. I suppose this is meant to set-up the fact that he's strong enough to bust out of handcuffs (!!!), but it's a very odd recurring image in the movie. There are a few lines in this movie that should be better known, such as the killer terrorizing a women while saying "Shut up, or I'll tear your tit off!" and the handsome cop stating "Adios, creep" after he's sent the killer to his grave.