Hoodtown

Bad Books for Bad People, Episode 80: Hoodtown

Christa Faust’s 2004 novel Hoodtown takes the reader to an alternate universe Los Angeles, where crime drama is brewing in an underground culture populated by masked wrestlers. Skulls will be cracked and butts will be fingered when Jack and Kate get in the ring with this pile-driving mix of murder mystery, romance, and action.

Why is it important to be nice to your local exotico? Does everyone from New Jersey have a gym membership? Is an especially skanky carpet the ultimate heel? All these questions and more will be explored in this episode of the podcast.

The Metal Monster of the Slot Canyon

A couple players in my ongoing Friday night Krevborna game gave me "nights off" by running something in usual campaign's stead. One of those games was Deadlands. My character was Frances D., aka Frances Donner, who survived the Donner Party ordeal but came away from the experience haunted by the ghosts of the eaten and charged with fighting supernatural evil by way of survivor's guilt.

Ironically, when the game started she was working as a camp cook.

The other characters were Alpeena (a conspiracy-theory obsessed gunslinger), Aloysius (a muck-raking journalist), and Sassafras (a kindly ranch hand).

We were headed through Deseret on a stagecoach when we stopped to see the twisted metal wreckage of a train crash. But we observed more than we bargained for; three tied-up folks were being menaced by gun-brandishing villains. Nearby the villains stood a large crate. Well, we couldn't stand idly by and watch these people get killed, so we took on the villains. During the course of the fight the leader of the villains blew a whistle, which caused a gosh-dang nosferatu to break out of the crate and join the melee. The gunluggers were easy enough to take down, but the nosferatu required some teamwork to dig the heart out of its chest.

One of the defeated toughs tried to make a run for it, but I knocked him out and dragged him back by the boots for questioning. After a few threats and a little interrogation, we learned that the group had been hired to steal a pile of ghost rock from the train. They were under the employ of One-Eye Abbie, whose hideout was somewhere in a nearby canyon.

We went into town and gathered more information. We learned that some sort of professor was holed up in the canyon as well. The town's blacksmith was particularly helpful; from the parts he had been asked to make for the boffin, we figured that the professor was building some sort of big metal automaton. That sounded like bad business, so we snuck out there to put an end to it.

We took Abbie and her hooligans by surprise. Aloysius distracted the goons while Alpeena dropped a boulder onto them from above in the canyon. When Aloysius came under fire, I came charging in with cleaver and pistol at the ready. We tried to get Abbie on-side, but she proved truculent and had to be killed as well.

There was some funny business with a big weird tuning fork, but I can't rightly say what that was all about.

However, when we found the professor, he had a sad tale to tell. Apparently the big metal contraption he was building was meant to be a kind of ambulatory life support for his wife--without it she'd die. The big metal body was also intended to be a weapon of revenge against the man who got her in such a sorry state. So, even though we had gone out there to stop him, we had a change of heart. Maybe we're soft-hearted fools--I guess we'll find out when the professor and his wife's deed makes the headlines one way or another.

The Ossuary

Hot--well, somewhat cold--pursuit of the Ushers' missing masks is underway, which means the characters are headed into a little dungeon for some exploration and violence. 

Oh yeah, Beebo the monkey talks now.

Characters

Aria, a paladin struggling with her true nature

Heck, an affable revenant looking for answers

Panthalassa, a necromancer with a missing arm

Daytona, a dhampir gunslinger fresh from Hell

Garazi, up and coming witch with a bird familiar

Willard Corn and King Beebo, a farmer and his monkey (?)

Events

We left off in the last session with the characters descending into the ossuary they had uncovered beneath the cemetery behind the Usher House. The walls and ceiling of the subterranean dungeon were lined with bones arranged in unnerving decorative patterns. Any doors they encountered were stolen from the crypts above; they were merely leaned against the portals they covered rather than being attached in any meaningful way. 

Daytona immediately triggered a spiked log to swing from out of the darkness and crash into the party as he went to inspect a crushed skeleton laying on the ground. In another chamber, Beebo noticed that the chandelier made of bone could be lowered; that also triggered something--but they never figured out exactly what that something was. In yet another room of the ossuary, they found a necromantic lab, complete with a pile of severed arms. They determined that someone had tried to cast a spell to preserve the dead flesh, but had failed. It should be noted that none of the arms were Panthalassa's missing limb.

As the group explored further, they discovered that the "ossuary" part of the caverns was connected to an undecorated system of caves--one of which opened out onto an underground river, complete with a violently swirling whirlpool. Tied to a rock was a rowboat meant for traversing the underground river. 

Another chamber in the ossuary was clearly a devotional room, as it was fitted out with an altar of bone and several pews. The altar cloth showed the symbol of the Fraternite du Cadavre. Upon the cloth were a number of scrolls, which were titled "Lord of Blood," "The Black Prince," and "Hymn of the Nightmother." A member of the party recalled that the Nightmother was a pagan death goddess, who wasn't worshiped so much as placated. She was also depicted as a multi-armed deity. Heck destroyed the altar, hoping to find something hidden within, but alas, now it was just a broken altar. 

Garazi spotted one of the Ushers' skull masks in a corridor, where it had presumably been dropped; Panthalassa put it on, but nothing happened. Meanwhile, a strange red rune briefly appeared on Daytona's forehead. The group determined that someone was trying to teleport him elsewhere. Panthalassa attempted to dispel the runes, but all she got for her trouble is a familiar voice in her head telling her that she was not a match for whoever was casting a spell on Daytona.

The party then examined a statue of the Grim Reaper that was stationed in an alcove. The base of the statue bore the legend "Beyond Death Lies Truth." When Heck moved the Reaper's scythe, the statue slide aside, revealing a small hiding place. Inside was an object wrapped in a cold wet cloth. Inside the cloth was a locked tome that Beebo was able to unlock. The book was titled Compendium of Death Gods and Major Spirits of the Dead, but its contents would require translation.

There was also a great deal of tomfoolery with some chairs sat at the base of statues of various necromantic figures, such as Dracula, Countess Alcesta, Count Magnus, the Grim Reaper, the Black Prince, and an uncouth and unfamiliar figure. Switching out who was sitting in which chair had no discernable effect.

As a change of pace, the group encountered someone who was actually still among the living in a tomb when they stumbled upon a snow elf named Eshrevaal rummaging around in piles of bones, hoping to chance upon repositories of necromantic energies. When they found him, he immediately assumed a defensive stance and drew an ice dagger, but Garazi managed to get him to drop his guard. The front of his shirt was covered in blood, but he explained that the blood was fake--it was intended to make people assume he was dangerous so they'd give him a wide berth. He explained what he knew of the Fraternite du Cadavre, as well as informing them of the presence of a foul-smelling chasm within the caverns, but also told them that he hadn't encountered any of the Fraternite members in the ossuary. The talked Eshrevaal into accompanying them as they finished exploring.

Meanwhile, more runes had appeared on Daytona's body and they were getting brighter.

In one of the caves, they found a number of wheels held aloft on spikes; the wheels had skeletons woven through them. Predictably, the skeletons animated when the group got near and clambered down the spikes with their wheels to roll menacingly at the party. The wheeling skeletons were not difficult to take down, but they kept reforming--even joining together to form new creatures when they were too damaged to continue on their own. Willard and Beebo figured out a novel way to circumvent the skeleton's constant reformation: they grabbed the skeletons' wheels and hurled them down the stairs. 

Some of the wheeling skeletons made a pleasing splash as they fell into the underground river and were swept into the whirlpool. The rest of the group began to follow suit with grabbing and throwing the wheels, but one of the skeletons managed to grab Aria's sword and take it with him into the river. Since that sword is near and dear to Aria's heart, she quickly tied a rope around her waist, handed the other end to her companions, and dove into the river after it. It was a tense moment, but Aria was able to wrest the sword from the skeleton's grasp just before it went down into the whirlpool.

The only thing left in the cavern was the chasm and the small underground lake nearby. There was a severed hand that had been gnawed upon at the lip of the charnal-smelling chasm. There was a small island at the center of the lake upon which stood a thin plinth. Beebo had the bright idea to retrieve the rowboat they had found earlier and use it to cross the lake. This was a wise move as they felt something touching the bottom of the boat as they crossed; if they had tried swimming instead they would have met whatever it was head-on. 

Beebo was able to climb up the plinth and retrieve an item from the top of it--it was a bone whistle on a leather thong. The whistle was determined to be magical. Tired of the dithering about it, Panthalassa blew the whistle; it summoned two monstrous humanoids garbed in ragged hoods from the depths of the cavern. The two figures claimed to have another of the Ushers' masks, but they would only trade it for FLESH. They preferred ROTTING FLESH, as it turned out. Beebo remembered the pile of arms they had found earlier and that made for the perfect exchange. The group now had two of the missing masks in their possession.

Having explored the extent of the ossuary, the group reemerged in the cemetery. Unfortunately, Daytona now found himself surrounded by a circle of runes that threatened to whisk him off to parts unknown. Before he vanished he handed Panthalassa his hat--a sure sign that he would make his way back to the group come Hell or high water.

Where did Daytona go? Read this to find out.

The Knights of the Helsing Vow and the Knights Labyrinthian

Below are two "knightly orders" in Krevborna that are nothing like knightly orders in practice.

The Knights of the Helsing Vow

The Knights of the Helsing Vow are a group of templars, witchfinders, inquisitors, and monster hunters associated with the Church of Holy Blood.

• Though the Helsing Knights hunt all manner of supernatural horrors, they hold a special enmity for the undead and view vampires as the ultimate expression of evil.

• The ultimate goal of the Helsing Knights is to conquer and reclaim the lands of Sibersk.

• Of the Church’s many factions, the Knights of the Helsing Vow are among the most militant, unbending, unforgiving, and secretive.

• One secret that the Helsing Knights zealously hide is the fact that the master of their order, Castor Leonidas, has fallen to darkness and currently serves Countess Alcesta von Karlok as a revenant knight.

The Knights Labyrinthian

The Knights Labyrinthian are a mystical conclave of gunslingers and rangers who are the heirs of a defunct order of knights sworn to protect pilgrims and penitents journeying to sacred sites.

• Although they are now knights in name only, the Knights Labyrinthian act as guards and guides for caravans traveling through Krevborna’s dangerous wilds.

• The Knights seek and study technology left behind by the Vlaak Empire and are particularly interested in the magical firearms found within Grail Tombs.

• Due to their frequent quests into the Grail Tombs, many of the Knights Labyrinthian inevitably fall into madness.

The Judas Sea

The sea off Krevborna's coast only got a cursory mention in the first edition of the setting book, so I'm aiming to change that with the forthcoming revised edition. Here's the starting point for what's going on with...

The Judas Sea

The Terrifying Ocean and Its Hidden Monstrosities

The waters of the Judas Sea are often rough and choppy, and the weather at sea is frequently temperamental. Vicious storms arise without warning and heavy fogs can obscure Krevborna’s coastline. The conditions conspire to make travel by sea to other lands perilous; few can boast of seeing foreign shores.

Hallmarks

The following elements and aesthetic notes define the Judas Sea:

    • The storms that fall on the Judas Sea are tempestuous and unrelenting. 

    • Reports of spectral ships and undead mariners abound.

    • The waters of the Judas Sea teem with monsters such as sea serpents, krakens, and horrible hybrids of man and crab.

    • Sailors mourn their compatriots who were lured into the depths by mermaids and sirens.

    • Legends speak of a city within the sea that is populated by once-human abominations.

The Snow Elves of Eisengraz

Illustration by Alexis Flower
from the comic I Roved Out

The populace of Eisengraz is mostly comprised of snow elves. Snow elves are immediately recognizable due to their alabaster skin and blizzard-white hair. Snow elves share the sharp features and ethereal presence of their kin, but they have the appearance of elves who have had all color leeched from their flesh.

Despite the way their culture endorses rugged survival, the snow elves are not necessarily rabid individualists. They celebrate the power of strong communal ties that enable the survival of the many rather than praising self-concerned individuals whose ascent endangers their fellows. 

To that end, the snow elves count a number of other peoples as members of their confederacy in Eisengraz. They employ urska servants as hunters, trackers, and as the honor guard of Lady Eriandel. In the mines beneath Eisengraz, allied clans of duergar excavate darkiron and craft the fearsome jagged blades prized by the snow elves as weapons of war.

Here are the stats for snow elves in my Savage Worlds game:

ALL THUMBS: Snow elves stick to the tried and true technology of a bygone age.  They have a −2 penalty when using mechanical devices. If they roll a Critical Failure while using such a device, it’s broken.

ENVIRONMENTAL RESISTANCE: Snow elves receive a +4 bonus to resist cold. Damage from cold is also reduced by 4.

ENVIRONMENTAL WEAKNESS: Snow elves suffer a –4 penalty to resist heat. The penalty also acts as a bonus to damage.

LOW LIGHT VISION: Elven eyes amplify light. They ignore penalties for Dim and Dark Illumination.

TOUGH: Snow elves are toughened by the harsh clime in which they live. They start with a d6 in Vigor instead of a d4. This increases maximum Vigor to d12+1.

OUTSIDER: Snow elves are distrusted by most residents of Krevborna. They subtract 2 from Persuasion rolls made to influence those who aren’t their own kind and they have few or no legal rights outside of Eisengraz.

WARLIKE: Snow elves start with a d6 in either the Fighting or Shooting skills due to their culture's emphasis on martial training.

The Decrepitude of the Usher House

This was one of those sessions that was mostly investigation and role-playing. After this one the characters are armed with information that will definitely allow them to start planning their next moves against the dark forces moving in Krevborna.

Characters

Aria, a paladin struggling with her true nature

Heck, an affable revenant looking for answers

Panthalassa, a necromancer with a missing arm

Daytona, a dhampir gunslinger fresh from Hell

Garazi, up and coming witch with a bird familiar

Genevieve, a dhampir alchemist

Events

Before leaving Veil's Nightside, the party made plans with Viktoria and Serafina to meet up with them before they went into hiding at Nightsong's family's inn. For their jaunt to the Nightside, Serafina had called in some favors with the graverobbers and resurrectionists of Veil; using her clout as the "Angel of the Graves," Serafina was able to get their drugged-into-insensibility bodies buried in shallow graves--complete with breathing tubes and signals to ring when they awoke from the effects of smoking the mysterious drug known as midnight bell. 

Serafina and Viktoria had preparations to make for their departure, but before they left they arranged to meet with the party at the edge of Veil. Serafina had an emotional goodbye with Panthalassa--well, as emotional as she's capable of--and thanked Genevieve for saving Nightsong's life. Viktoria had analyzed the samples she took from Heck and Aria and had at least a little information for them both:

Heck was informed that he numbered among the undead; specifically, he was a revenant who had come back from the grave to seek vengeance on the man who slew him. When asked if revenants could survive the act of achieving revenge, Viktoria told him that sometimes that occurred, but she wasn't sure what mechanism enabled them to exist after their purpose was fulfilled. 

Aria was told that she wasn't human either. Her exact categorization eluded Viktoria, but when she listened to the sample of Aria's flesh instead of just looking at it, she heard "the discordant song" of Aria's being. This led her to conclude that Aria was an eldritch creation of an entity from the Outer Dark. Viktoria advised her to seek cultists who served such abominations to learn more.

Viktoria also gave Panthalassa a mechanical doll to try to get to Pendleton so they could communicate over the distance.

Nightsong said her goodbyes as well, and had presents for each member of the group:

• Heck was given a harmonica with instructions on how to play "Man of Constant Sorrow."
• Genevie was given a bottle of miscellaneous pills and the promise that Nightsong "owed her one" for bringing her back from death's door.
• Garazi was given Adrian Vergara's silver calling card case, which she had picked out of his pocket.
• Aria was given two lipsticks--Whore of Babylon and Scarlet Woman were the two shades.
• Daytona was tossed a sack of slot machine tokens for a future trip to Lakona.
• Willard was given a pile of cat comics and King Beebo was handed a dangerous-looking gun.
• Panthalassa was told that Nightsong had commissioned a nude drawing of Thomasina, but she was actually given a daguerreotype of Serafina and Nightsong side by side, their faces tilted toward each other. 

With all parting words exchanged, Nightsong, Serafina, and Viktoria rode off in the direction of the mountains. The group traveled south to Hemlock Hollow.

When they arrived, Garazi went to her family's house on the outskirts of town to prepare them for meeting her new friends the next day. In the meantime, the group decided this was a fine time to spend some of their loot. Unfortunately, Daytona had a run-in with a villain from his past in the form of Wagner Highcross--a gunslinging vampire responsible for more than one massacre. Of course, when Wagner made a crack about Catarina, Daytona lashed out and tried to punch his nemesis. Wagner sidestepped the blow and pushed Daytona to the ground. Daytona went for his gun and shot Wagner, but being a vampire he was not too bothered by that. Besides, that's probably just how he and Daytona say "hello."

The rest of the group came running out of the shop to Daytona's aid, but Wagner wasn't looking for a fight--he even tried to make the group's acquaintance, but obviously they weren't interested. Genevieve did turn on the charm; through her maneuverings, they were able to learn that the reason Wagner was in town was that he was scouting out who was pledging their efforts to which side of the Hellwar on behalf of Countess Alcesta von Karlok. Wagner eventually stalked off, but the group added him to the every-growing list of things to worry about.

The next day, the group descended on Garazi's family for an evening of feasting and the kind of domestic joys they hadn't had the opportunity to be part of for some time. Of course, in the morning, it was back to the business of adventuring.

The group's attempt to meet with Helena Graymalk was stymied, but they were spotted by Lorelei Graymalk, who brought them into a private sitting room for tea. Lorelei did her best to answer their questions in her mother's stead. In particular, they got the lowdown on Grigori Trask, who was using a Church-endorsed assassin named Maxim Lukash, aka "The Lash," to track down the group. Lorelei was also able to tell them that Hemlock Hollow was experiencing a spate of burglaries related to necromantic items of power. Among those she pointed out who might hold such artifacts were Ivy Valerio, a local spiritualist medium, and the Ushers...who Panthalassa already suspected were involved with the attack on her family.

The group was leery of approaching the Ushers, so they went to Ivy Valerio's House of Spirits first. Their questions made Ivy immediately suspicious, but she was happy to take their money and summon the spirits of various folks they had killed, such as Valancourt Carathis, Markos Delarosa, and Darvala Kohn. When the lights dimmed, Ivy was able to summon the specters of the departed within a cloud of hissing smoke and compel them to answer a few questions that were put to them. The group received a lot of intelligence in these seances, but it will be up to them to sift that information in the future.

With no other avenues left open to them, they decided it was time to pay a visit to the House of Usher. The house was dilapidated; some of the upper floors listed to the side, some portions of the foundation had sunken in, and a large crack ran down the face of the house. The man carrying a candelabra who answered their knock was also in danger of collapsing; he was seemingly ancient and, like Panthalassa, he was missing his left arm. He brought them inside and related that the Ushers had recently suffered an attack by hooded miscreants. He told them that the attackers had amputated his arm and made off with it. He also told them that the skull masks used by the Ushers in their necromantic rituals were taken as well. 

Given the timeline of events, it meant that the Ushers were not responsible for the attack on Panthalassa and the Sabbaths; rather, the folks who had stolen the masks from the Ushers were responsible for the attack Panthalassa had survived.

When asked about the nature of the ritual that the Ushers undertake, the man brought them down into the basement. In a sealed chamber they saw a glass coffin holding the body of a red-headed woman in repose. The man explained that the body before them was Madeline Usher and that their rites involving the skull masks kept her in a state of unnatural slumber. Asked why Madeline needed to be kept in torpor, he told them that Madeline Usher was the first to master the arts of magic--and that her mastery had both given her the destructive power of a god and driven her hopelessly insane. If she should awaken, the man believed she would destroy the entire world.

The group now had a reason to find the necromantic thieves and return the masks to the Ushers.

The Ushers had tried to follow the thieves through the cemetery behind their house, but they disappeared without a trace and were not seen emerging from the burial grounds. The group decided to take a look for themselves. In the cemetery, they noticed that many of the gravestones and crypts were marked with the symbol of a compass atop a skull. Genevieve recognized the symbol as the mark of a supposedly defunct secret society known as the Fraternite du Cadavre. When Daytona pulled the left arm of an angelic statue that had the Fraternite's symbol on its base, they heard a rumbling from a nearby crypt.

Peering inside, they saw that a secret passage leading down into the darkness had opened. Lighting a lantern, they descended...

We'll find out what they discover next time.